(crs) Enjoy your drunk friend's ravings vol.2

At what point does the coyote decide to gnaw through his own foot to escape from the trap?

A) When he wakes up groggy from vodka tonics and just in time to notice he’ll definitely be late for work
B) When his lack of groceries forces him into packing a lunch that consists of pouring off-brand Oatie-Oh’s over a bunch of grapes in a gallon-sized ziplock
C) When his earphones break on the metro and all he has to listen is the slow wheezings of the aging spinster gouging her purse into his back

The answer is none of the above, because clearly coyotes don’t like grapes, but were I a coyote I would be bleeding from a stump right now.

So, good morning! I thought that after my initial posting, it might be the right thing to do to introduce myself. My name’s Chris, and I’m going to be the John Q. Public of beeinacar. Sure, I don’t have fancy underground indie knowledge like the other snots on this blog, but I have a certain rustic charm. While they’re out living the sweet life, dining on orca sushi in expensive restaurants with Heidi Klum, I’m working the daily grind. I know what you’re going through. We’re talking about the real-life every-day stuff here. Go to them for advice about art, music, and fashion, but when you want to hear about booze, VD, or the legal ramifications of exposing yourself to the night-shift staff at Walmart, then you come to me.

Unfortunately, I’ve already started on the Oatie-Oh’s, and they’ve ushered what remains of the hooch from last night into the lower regions of my GI tract, so I must away. Looking forward to seeing you again, and to keeping you updated on my doings as I stumble through life. TTFN!